Uh....Explanation Please?

Recently, our family came across a list of weird insurance forms. Mom copied this from Mrs. Alley's copy. Enjoy. I will leave in the original punctuation so that you will get the full experience.


Try to summarize exactly what happened in a few words or less on insurance or accident forms. The following quotes were taken from these forms and were eventually published in the TORONTO SUNDAY, July 26, 1977.

Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and a collided with a tree I don't have.

I thought my window was down but found out it was up when i put my hand through it.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

The guy was all over the road I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother in law and veared over the embankment.

In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I had been shopping for plants all day, And was on my way home as I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision. I did not see the other car.

I had been driving my car for four years when  I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

I was on my way to the Doctor's with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddently appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrain.

My car was legally parked as I backed into the other vehicle.

An invisible car appeared out of nowhere, struck my vehical, and vanished.

I told the police I was not injured, But on removing my hat I found that I had a skull fracture.

I was sure that the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him.

The pedestrian had no idea what direction to go, so I  ran over him.

I saw the slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off my car. The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

I was thrown from my car as I left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows. 

The telephone pole was approaching fast i was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end.

I was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other vehical. the driver and passenger then left immediately for a vacation with injuries.

I find these pretty funny. Especially the one about rear end trouble, universal joint giving way, and the accident. 

But here is the gospel application. We need to be careful of what we say. These were probably not thought about with care. They were most likely hurried and quick. When we are talking to others we must speak carefully. Words build up and tear down. I find myself often speaking without thinking. It is hard to think before everything we say. I could never do it by myself. But that is where the gospel comes in. I am trusting in Jesus for everything. So that includes...well, everything. It is so great to know that I don't need to do it by myself. But that is where the asking comes in. I must ask God for wisdom in what I say, so as to build up others, to encourage, strengthen. 

So as you finish reading this blog post and move on to your day, keep in mind that everything we say will be accounted for. And by the same person who offers His services in speaking profitably. I don't know about you, but  I am going to ask Him right now that He would guide me as I seek to wisely communicate with my friends and family.

Update on Ray

So, last post I was asking for prayer for strength to share the gospel with Ray and his parents. Well, that Thursday I had just gotten out of class and I was just chatting with my friends. I glanced over at Ray's parents sitting by the side and realized that I was as soon about to go talk to them as  I was to run at a wall. You know that feeling? You feel like you're about to slam your face into a wall. But with a strength that couldn't have been mine, I drifted away from the group and putting one foot in front of the other made my way toward them. When  I got over there I introduced myself and found it much easier to continue talking than it was to start. I really enjoyed our conversation. I also managed to invite them to our church, which took a level of boldness  I wasn't sure I knew existed in me. Anyway, I walked away from that P.E. class with the best feeling ever. So, I ran at that wall and expected to slam my face into it, but God opened a "door" and I found openness to the gospel and Him. Thank you, Jesus!